Writer's update: Fear and worst-case scenario edition
And why murder kitties and sawmills must wait
For the past two weeks plus I've had two very different stories in my head to share with you. I've written drafts, gone for walks thinking about them, and brought them into my dreams.
I want to write about murder kitties and sawmills!
I want to write about murder kitties and sawmills!
I want to write about murder kitties and sawmills!
But the murder kitties and the sawmills are being elusive, as they sometimes are.
Quick preview before I share the emotional, get-your-kleenex story that wants to come through first:
Murder kitties = an affectionate name my friend Matthew calls all large cats, including the mountain lion that has been roaming up on the land I steward in New Mexico.
Sawmills = a beautiful machine which is helping us turn torched trees into tons of lumber to build things up at Warrior Heart Ranch.
I'll keep working on both articles, with lots of pics for the sawmill article. I just got word that Franklin, Mary, and Sat (who is helping up on the land for the summer) are currently working together on our first A-frame cabin out of land-milled lumber. Yeeeeeee!
I'm currently traveling in Scotland with my long-time friend and godmama Gini Gentry. We've walked with each other through many life experiences over the 30 years we've known each other. I wrote my first book at her house outside of Santa Fe in 2004; she helped with the final edits on the current book.
So she was the perfect person to walk me through my current book-related fear and freak out fest.
Exhaustion, travel, and the effort of birthing a book caught up with me in Edinburgh a few days ago. I felt frazzled and I couldn't help myself from worrying about the book launch. Had I done enough? Was the writing okay? Were people going to love it? Was it going to be a success? What if it was an epic flop?
So Gini guided me through the worst-case scenario game.
This is a great game to play as a way to calm the fuck down. Because once you truly face the worst-case scenario, and breath through it with love, you can let go and just be with whatever is going to happen.
Pretty quickly into the game I realized that Wild, Willing, and Wise was most likely, in the 99.5% arena, going to be a flop in how I was defining it.
I love this new book so much, and I want it to be as loved and shared and inspiring to thousands as my bestseller, Warrior Goddess Training. And it might be. But more likely it will not. Not because it is not a great, funny, and wise book. Not because it has not been well-supported and carefully crafted. Not because is isn’t filled with creative solutions for challenging situations and soul-deepening questions. No – only because it is incredibly, truly rare for a book to sell enough copies to become a bestseller.
My writing motto has always been: if this book/article/blog helps just one person it will have been a success.
And yet it is easy to forget this as you are putting in the tremendous effort and years or work it takes to write, publish, and market a book. I think most writers dream of their books changing the world while creating an abundant stream of royalties so they can sip tea and write more books in some remote cabin, uninterrupted by the need to answer emails or hustle to share what they have written.
But like all art, writing asks us to step out into the world and not only create, but also share what we have created. It asks us to expand our own boundaries, and explore beyond our fears. It asks us to give 100 percent, and then surrender 100 percent. It asks us to be willing to fail and then to start all over again.
As Gini and I were talking I realized that my newest book has already been wildly successful, even before it is released into the world.
Here’s the story.
In mid-February my publisher shipped me three advanced reader’s copies of Wild, Willing, and Wise.
This was the month we learned that my neighbor, Marla, had lung cancer that had metastasized to her brain. I was sitting with Marla and her daughters KC and Kimberly one afternoon when I got the impulse to give them one of the precious copies of Wild, Willing, and Wise.
At first my inner Gollum definitely came out — my precious! — and didn’t want to part with one of the three books.
But I’ve learned to follow the quiet inner guide and not the Gollum, and so I gave Marla one of my three copies.
Marla died five weeks later, on April 1st. I was blessed to hold her hand in the hospital and wish her farewell. How I miss her.
A few weeks after Marla’s passing Kimberly shared with me how impactful the book had been for Marla and her family:
Marla, weak from chemo but still optimistic, sat with Kimberly and KC in their living room as they read this early copy of Wild, Willing, and Wise out loud to each other. They laughed hysterically. They did all the exercises together. And the book gave them a way to find some ease and connection and giggles in the midst of cancer.
When Kimberly shared this with me I cried. She cried. We laughed. And I felt Marla smiling at me and saying, as she often did after the fire: “it’s going to be okay.”
You can pre order Wild, Willing, and Wise now for July 30th delivery straight to your doorstep!
Or even better get ye out to our local bookstore and pre-order your copy there!
Click one of these links to order online now:
bookshop.org • amazon.com • barnesandnoble.com • St. Martin’s Press
Thank you so much! And it is a huge help to authors when you share, like, and especially write reviews! : )
Wild, Willing, Wise online workshop on Saturday
I’m offering a Wild, Willing, Wise workshop this Saturday, July 13th as a pay-what-you-can offering. Learn more at https://warriorgoddess.com/workshop
Book giveaways and more when you join live; and yes it is also recorded!
Book Tour 2024!
Come to a live event or join in the July 30th launch celebration…
All the deets at wildwillingwise.com
Family love… Marla on the left. Clockwise: KC, Kimberly, Warrior Goddess musician Laura, my goddaughter Rowan, and Kimberly’s husband CK, 2023.
