Shitty First Drafts

And staying the course through the ups and downs

Sep 06, 2024

One of my most prized possessions is a vintage hard-sided black trunk with worn brass latches.

Inside are decades of my journals in various-sized notebooks, high school and college newspaper articles I authored, and copies Farmer Bob's, a local community newspaper I co-founded.

Since I first learned the alphabet, writing has been such a huge part of my life. I wrote in a journal every day for decades to capture and integrate my experiences. I became a journalist in high school and was voted editor of our Singapore American School newspaper, and in college I was a Features Writer and later the Features Editor of University of California at Davis newspaper, The California Aggie.

Before I wrote and self-published my first book I spent years writing articles, blog posts, interviews, and teachings for my students.

Sometimes we think writing just comes naturally, that writers are sprung fully formed, dictionary in one hand and pen in another.

But becoming a writer, whether you are using writing as a way to process or a way to share, is a practice.

Writing is an exercise that takes building our courage to be vulnerable and our creativity to explore. It also takes a whole hell of a lot of patience and shitty first drafts.

As one of my favorite writers Anne Lamott writes: “Almost all good writing begins with terrible first efforts. You need to start somewhere. Start by getting something—anything—down on paper. What I’ve learned to do when I sit down to work on a shitty first draft is to quiet the voices in my head.”

The first draft of my first book -- The Four Elements of Change: Tools for Living a Centered Life – was stilted, ragged, and dry as a cracker all at the same time. An excellent shitty first draft.

I almost gave up writing forever when I read it through the first time and realized how truly bad it was.

But somehow I found the determination to throw the first version out and start again. To find more freedom in my voice, to stop trying to make it perfect.

First edition of my first book *The Four Elements of Change*, self-published May 1, 2003

Completing that first book opened a door in my heart to becoming more myself through my writing.

I started reading books about and for writers. I read to understand language, metaphor, and nuance. I traveled roads and cities and universes through words, looking for the arch of a story and the skill of captivating attention.

I've gone on to write nine published books, a handful of self-published works, and hundreds of blogs, articles, and newsletters. Plus, I still journal as a practice of integrating and honoring my days.

Another self-published project; this was the audio version of a book I wrote in 2010. This book then became the inspiration for *The Warrior Goddess Way*.

And I keep writing first shitty drafts and exploring and being uncomfortable. Because writing, like any art, is about stretching and expanding ourselves from the inside out.

Whether you have a stack of books by your bed, you listen to audiobooks, or you write as a profession or for integration, you know the power of words. They connect us. Words inspire, shock, delight, open new doorways.

Whether you dream of days reading in a hammock, or of writing your heroine's story or the five lessons you learned from your grandmother: writing, and reading the written word, is about ripening.

And the best way to ripen is to be around other ripe fruit.

This is one of the reasons I’ve spent the month of January in Woodstock NY each year; to be around other writer friends who are avid readers so I can become more juicy, nourished, and nourishing in my own writing.

And it is also the reason I’m on currently on this wild two-month, 25-city tour; to ripen my writing by getting feedback, inspiration, questions, and having conversations with people, face to face, heart to heart.

March 17, 2013 book tour with don Miguel Ruiz Jr. for *The Toltec Path of Transformation*, which was the third version of *The* *Four Elements of Chang*e, re-edited and published by Hierophant Publishing.

This picture above is a little painful for me to see… just because I remember the deep agony I was in as I navigated a divorce, and I can see it in my face. Ooof, that was hard. It was also such a joyous time because I was on tour with the my mentor don Miguel Ruiz and the Ruiz family and feeling so blessed and excited to share my first traditionally published book.

So I’ll share one more pic… 11 years later, still touring, loving my life, ecstatic to be doing what I love: writing books and sharing the teachings with others. And getting to be in numerous independent bookstores across the country and buy more books!

August 2024, Woodstock New York book event for *Wild, Willing, and Wise*

What is something you’ve persevered at? Or what is something you have always wanted to do and could start now? Honor the places you’ve been tenacious and generous in your craft - whether that is writing, raising kids, art, or a spiritual path. And open with curiosity to what secret longings are still in your heart that want to be expressed. Be willing to be messy, and start with a shitty draft.

Shitty First Drafts

And staying the course through the ups and downs

Discussion about this post